As time has passed since the passing of the late Sen. John McCain, this is a good time not to pass over one of the better eulogies in his memory and the lessons it offers to communicators.
At McCain’s own request, President George W. Bush and President Barack Obama led the eulogies and stole the headlines. McCain wanted it that way. He wanted the world to see that in America we settle political scores at the ballot box and thereafter break bread at the table of ideals. But buried among the communion crumbs was a speech that students of political and social rhetoric should take note. It came from none other than Henry Kissinger.
In many respects, these two men share nothing in common, and yet everything in common. Separated by a generation, they represent different chapters in American history. Kissinger’s coming of age came during a time when American power was ascending, McCain’s came when American power was fracturing. But Kissinger’s flight from Nazi tyranny formed his views on the ideals and values of America every bit much as communist captivity formed McCain’s.

Former presidents Barack Obama, George W. Bush, Senator Joe Lieberman, and Meghan McCain were among the speakers eulogizing the late Senator John McCain at his September 1st funeral.
The former Secretary of State under President Nixon, and co-recipient of the 1973 Nobel Peace Prize for negotiating a ceasefire in the Vietnam War is not especially noted for his oratory. The plodding, bookish, and deliberative elder statesman speaks with a heavy German-accented monotone that is the antithesis 21stcentury talking heads. But his eulogy of Sen. McCain was a speech writing lesson in structure, substance and delivery.
By contemporary standards his eulogy was short, just 738 words. But it carried exponentially more power, focus and ultimately a more forceful persuasion of McCain’s legacy than did a wandering speech by Sen. Joseph Lieberman who rambled for more than 20 minutes, often times talking more about himself. Kissinger’s eulogy had a clear beginning, middle, and end. In the first two sentences, he tells the audience what the speech is all about—one of history’s great personalities that remind us of unity and sustaining values. “John McCain was one of those gifts of destiny,” said Kissinger. Every word that followed supported and transcended this notion.
Kissinger powerfully attempted to prove that gift of destiny with an admission of his own guilt. Guilt about what he too didn’t do in life and what he couldn’t do. The former diplomat acknowledged that he had the chance to free McCain during his negotiations with Hanoi to end the Vietnam War. McCain thanked his captors for the offer, but refused. Kissinger had to wait until 1973 to finally meet McCain at a White House reception for several prisoners who were finally freed. Kissinger remembered, “When we finally met, his greeting was both self effacing and moving. ‘Thank you for saving my honor.’” It was all because as Kissinger noted, that in the McCain family national service was its own reward that did allow for special treatment.
Kissinger noted that McCain, too, returned to an America divided over its presidency and the direction of the country. Perhaps in an affront to the current administration, Kissinger skillfully challenged the notion that America cannot retreat from the world stage. McCain, he said, would never allow for it. “In this manner John McCain’s name became synonymous with an America that reached out to the powerful to be loyal and reach out to the oppressed,” said Kissinger.
Perhaps most powerfully, Kissinger reflected upon his own failings as a world leader to instill hope and set for a call for action. “Like most people my age, I feel a longing for what is lost and cannot be restored,” reflected Kissinger. He then hypothesized that if beauty and youth are fleeting and short lived, then sacrifice for the greater good is ultimately what endures—qualities McCain proved.
His conclusion was as short and strong as his “gift of destiny” beginning. As if to put an exclamation point on his opening sentence, Kissinger declared, “The world will be lonelier without John McCain.” But in perhaps a tribute to the late Senator he challenged all Americans to fill the void. Kissinger concluded, “Henceforth, the country’s honor is ours to sustain.”
But it was more than Kissinger’s words. Students of speech and communicators who want to better connect with their audiences should also pay close attention to Kissinger’s delivery. He spoke in short, declarative sentences. Each one commanded its own power. They willed the listener to pay attention. In a teleprompter world, Kissinger goes back to an era where oratory was delivered from paper and memory, not from glass. For reference, go back and watch every JFK speech, especially his “We choose the moon” address. It’s a skillset where the speaker delivers no more words than the simple sentences and thoughts in front of him. With this style, Kissinger created a cadence and rhythm that drew in the listener.
It was certainly not the most talked about eulogy of John McCain. McCain’s daughter, Meghan delivered her own powerfully emotional and political charged memorial to her father. In a headline news world, Kissinger didn’t make the cut. But for communicators his words deserve serious study because they offer a highly focused rhetorical map in a Google Maps world.
Here is the text of Henry Kissinger’s eulogy on Sen. McCain:
Our country has had the good fortune that at times of national trial a few great personalities have emerged to remind us of our essential unity and inspire us our sustaining values. John McCain was one of those gifts of destiny.
I met john for the first time in April, 1973 at a White House reception for prisoners returned from captivity in Vietnam. He had been much on my mind during the negotiation to end the Vietnam War, oddly also because his father, then commander in chief of the Pacific command, when briefing the president answered references to his son by saying only “I pray for him.”
In the McCain family national service was its own reward that did not allow for special treatment. I thought of that when his Vietnamese captors during the final phase of negotiations offered to release John so that he could return with me on the official plane that had brought me to Hanoi. Against all odds, he thanked them for the offer but refused it. When we finally met, his greeting was both self effacing and moving. “Thank you for saving my honor.” He did not tell me then or ever that he had had an opportunity to be freed years earlier but had refused, a decision for which he had to endure additional periods of isolation and hardship. Nor did he ever speak of his captivity again during the near half century of close friendship.
John’s focus was on creating a better future. As a senator, he supported the restoration of relations with Vietnam, helped bring it about on a bipartisan basis in the Clinton administration and became one of the advocates of reconciliation with his enemy. Honor, it is an intangible quality, not obligatory. It has no code. It reflects an inward compulsion, free of self interest. It fulfills a cause, not a personal ambition. It represents what a society lives for beyond the necessities of the moment. Love makes life possible; honor and nobility. For john it was a way of life.
John returned to America divided over its presidency, divided over the war. Amidst all of the turmoil and civic unrest, divided over the best way to protect our country and over whether it should be respected for its power or its ideals. John came back from the war and declared this is a false choice. America owed it to itself to embrace both strengths and ideals in decades of congressional service, ultimately as chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee, John was an exponent of an America strong enough to its purpose.
But John believed also in a compassionate America, guided by core principles for which American foreign policy must always stand. “With liberty and justice for all” is not an empty sentiment he argued, it is the foundation of our national consciousness. To John, American advantages had universal applicability. I do not believe he said that there’s an errant exception any more than there is a black exception or an Asian or Latin exception. He warned against temptation of withdrawal from the world. In this manner John McCain ‘s name became synonymous with an America that reached out to oblige the powerful to be loyal and give hope to the oppressed.
John lines of all these battles for decency and freedom. He was an engaged warrior fighting for his causes with a brilliance, with courage, and with humility. John was all about hope. In a commencement speech at Ohio’s Wesleyan University John summed up the essence of his engagement of a lifetime. “No one of us, if they have character, leaves behind a wasted life.” Like most people of my age I feel a longing for what is lost and cannot be restored. If the happy and casual beauty of youth prove ephemeral, something better can endure and endure until our last moment on Earth and that is the moment in our lives when we sacrifice for something greater than ourselves. Heroes inspire us by the matter of factness of their sacrifice and the elevation of the root vision.
The world will be lonelier without John McCain, his faith in America and his instinctive sense of moral duty. None of us will ever forget how even in his parting John has bestowed on us a much needed moment of unity and renewed faith in the possibilities of America. Henceforth, the country’s honor is ours to sustain.
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